Cultivate A Gratitude Practice

Cultivating a gratitude practice is as simple as writing down three to five things or moments from your day that you are grateful for.

Paying attention to big and small moments that brought you joy, made you laugh, or helped you get through the day creates a healthy mindset of looking for positive moments instead of getting stuck on the low points of the day.

Even in 2020 we can find three to five things we are thankful for, right?

In March, moving my counseling practice online (over a weekend) and not really leaving our house WAS A LOT to navigate. It was a lot for all of us to navigate. It continues to be lot to navigate…

Honestly, my gratitude practice held me together some nights in March and April of this year. Those early days of being quarantined at home felt like scarcity at its finest. Nothing was as it should be and it didn’t feel like there was going to be enough toilet paper/meat/jobs/ventilators for everyone. It was way too much scarcity for my mind to hold, but I knew gratitude is the antidote to scarcity.

Every night before putting my daughter in her bed, I would rock her and name the three best parts of my day. Just writing them down wasn’t enough for me at that time I had to say them out loud.

Sometimes it was as basic as a blooming flower in our yard, listening to good music, seeing family on FaceTime, or finding that scarce toilet paper. But I needed to name it. Each and every one one of those moments deserved the credit for being a good part to my day.

Gratitude is an incredible framework to see your day through... even if it was a rough day.

Practicing it every day helps to rewire your brain. SHOUT OUT to neuroplasticity! Our brains will always be trying to keep us safe; and safety seeking means to remember when we felt scared, which is great to keep us from walking in front of moving cars. BUT we also need to remember the joyous moments too and sometimes our brains need the extra help.

Cultivating a gratitude practice is scientifically shown to help you become more optimistic, feel better about your life as a whole, and make progress toward your goals.

If you are looking for some ideas of what you might include in your gratitude practice, here are some ideas:

• the sunrise/sunset

• the funny thing your friend/kid/tv character said

• listening to a favorite song while doing the dishes

• the hard conversation you had with a friend

• savoring your cup of coffee

  Cultivate the life you want through gratitude because there is good stuff all around us.

Five Free Mindfulness Practices to Build Self-Compassion

"I need more coping skills to handle _________." This sentence is the one I hear most often when potential clients call my office. Almost every woman I speak with fills in that blank differently. However, the coping skills I offer to them often look the same because some skills are relevant to a variety of difficult life situations. One of the skills I often offer to clients is Mindful Self-Compassion.

This skill is a specific type of mindfulness. If you are unfamiliar with this word, then here is a definition: Mindfulness is the practice of paying attention to what is happening around you and within you. It is a proven coping skill to effectively help with stress relief, improve quality of life, become less emotionally reactive, and increase relationship satisfaction. 

If you are looking for a way to get started trying out this practice, then I recommend the FREE Insight Timer app. It offers a variety of guided mindfulness meditations. Did I mention it’s free? 

One of the most popular kinds of mindfulness with researchers and clinicians is Mindful Self-Compassion. Kristin Neff, a self-compassion researcher and author, explains that many people confuse this practice with self-pity, self-indulgence, or self-esteem. These understandings all miss the point. A better definition of Mindful Self-Compassion is: treating yourselves with kindness during moments of difficulty or suffering. I often recommend this practice to clients because it can increase life satisfaction, as well as decreased depression, anxiety and stress. 

If you are looking for a way to get started with this type of mindfulness practice, then here are a few of my favorite self-compassion meditations that can help you using the Insight Timer App….

Lisa Abramson - Five Minutes of Self-Compassion - 04:15
Kristin Neff - Self-Compassion Break - 05:20
Sharon Salzberg Lovingkindness Meditation · 15:04
Kristin Neff - Working With Emotions in the Body: Soften, Soothe, Allow - 16:01
Kristin Neff - Compassionate Body Scan - 23:55

Any mindful practice you begin to implement will feel new and different. But stay with it and see where it takes you. What I have found with my clients is mindfulness exercises are a great in giving you a new way to handle your "_________."

If you are in Nashville and need more support with handing your "_________" then contact Jessica for a free fifteen-minute phone consultation.