These are a few of my favorite things : February Edition

One of my passions is self-care. The thing about self-care is that most of us "know" we need it, but we do not always know how to do it. This year I am focusing on my holistic self-care. I am trying to intentionally incorporate caring for myself in physical, spiritual, emotional, and relational ways. Here are a few ideas that have helped me in 2016. 

1. Bora Bora Fireballs: Don't let the name scare you off. This is my favorite new recipe of 2016. These meatballs are a gluten-free, dairy-free, and refined sugar-free meal that taste amazing. What is especially great about this meal is how many you make at once and then can eat throughout the week. But be warned you may go through them faster than you think. Large batch cooking saves time later in the week (and gives you more space for other self-care practices). 

2.  Brené Brown's COURAGEworks Living Brave Semester:  Brené Brown holds a special place in my life. I connect with her work due to her authentic voice and strong research background. Going through her virtual classroom has lead to multiple personal shifts. Read how this class has impacted my re-evaluation of my values. 

3. Diamonds by JohnnySwim: In December I attended JohnnySwim's Holiday show (and I am already hoping they come back to Nashville next December). A few of their songs resonate with me, but this song is one of my new favorites. I love the resilience pouring from this song: "We are the brave. We are the chosen ones. We are the diamonds, rising up out the dust." Listen to Diamonds and let me know what you think. We're the light when the day is done. 

4. Sacred Space: The Prayer Book 2016 - Sacred Space is a book of daily readings that include six prayers, a Scripture reading, and a brief reflection. One thing I love about this book is the way these prayers and reflections often point towards connecting to Jesus through emotional experiences. In my spiritual practice of self-care, I am constantly searching for resources that are able to connect both mentally and emotionally in deepening my faith. This book continues to be a treasure. 

 5. Nayyirah Waheed's poetry: I cannot describe her work and art better than she can. So here are a few of my favorite poems.

What are some of your favorite things in your life? What practices or items are bringing you joy? Do you have any highlights from February?

Self-Care Saturday: Creating Space for Reflection

Creating space for reflection can be one of the best tools for self-care. But slowing down and quieting your mind may be difficult. Removing yourself from the hustle of daily life may seem like an unnecessary step. Yet, often that step of creating quiet space provides a new level of creativity and thought. (Maybe this is why people say they do their best thinking in the shower). Here are some questions to reflect on this week in your quiet space. Your reflections can help re-channel your energy to produce deeper richness through the day. 

Sacred Space is a powerful daily prayer book. 

When are you feeling more hopeful? 
Where are you being encouraged? 
How are you growing in life-giving ways?                                                                                             In what activities or occasions are you using your strengths? 
Which of your relationships give you the most life and hope? 

After reflecting on these questions consider how you can make more space for these life-giving experiences and relationships. Part of creating this space will require saying "no" to something (and people) in order to say "yes" to more fruitful ways of being. Consider how you might change your daily or weekly rhythm to intentionally incorporate these practices. 

Values Light Your Way

This year I am working through Brené Brown's Living Brave semester. One of her recommended practices is reviewing your value system. She states, “A value is a way of being or believing that you hold most important.” Brené explains that values light your way as you move through life.

She uses the image of a lantern to describe what values can be like in your life. She explains, “There are no guarantees in the arena. We will struggle. We will even fail. There will be darkness. But if we are clear about the values that guide us in our efforts to show up and be seen, we will always be able to find the light. We will know what it means to live brave.” Which values light up your life in the darkness? 

Maybe you have never wrestled with what values you want to shape your life. Or maybe you are in a new season and your life values are changing. Either way now is the time to re-evaluate what you hold most important. 

Here is a short list of values that might be good guideposts for you. Pick those that can serve as filters for your decisions this year (e.g. Does having that hard conversation with my best friend lead me to be more courageous?). Select those that give insight into the core of who you are and who you want to be. Ultimately, choose a few that will help you bring light into a dark world.

When I started my private practice I created a list of "lanterns" that I wanted to illuminate my counseling. After I picked them I wrote a sentence decribing the way I wanted that value to impact my work with women, children, and families. Here they are...

Practicing Bravery: Stepping up in moments when you feel overwhelmed or afraid, but instead you choose to respond with brave action. 

Embracing Humor: Allowing the humorous moments in life to give you joy and shift your mood towards positivity and gratitude. 

Living Authentically: Choosing intentionally to be yourself instead of falling into roles that do not align with your values and passions. 

Nurturing Self-Compassion: Creating a true friendship within by giving yourself permission to treat yourself the way you care for others. 

Cultivating True Connections: Surrounding yourself with life-giving people and practicing ways that create healthier connections with those life-taking relationships. 

Writing Your Story: Owning the hard chapters of life and moving towards writing new ones. 

If you are wrestling with your core values and need some help, then feel free to contact me. Or if you are looking for a therapist who works out of the above six values, then I am happy to do a free 15-minute consultation over the phone.